Diary of a Sex-Starved Pseudo-Mennonite, Part 29

Often a Pisces senses when you are attempting to manipulate them and if they love you or they don't care or they want to see what happens, they go along to get along. It's the rare situations where we miss your covert intent that fuck us sideways.

Pisces is the only sign Scorpio cannot manipulate. Hence Scorpio's love/hate compulsion to dominate our innumerable delicious offerings. Greedy Scorpio wants all of us. But they don't want us to know that. And they don't want to give us anything to get our everything (all that plus a Costco-sized bag of chips). Because that might make them appear weak. Or vulnerable. Or in want. Or in need. Or out of control. But guess what, Scorpy-Scorp? You're the 1 who needs me if the earthly realm is no longer gettin' it done for you. Fixed and perhaps limited by your devotion to terrestrial distractions, I'm your ticket to the galaxy and all her otherworldly ecstasies. I don't need you, Stinger. I don't even live here.

When I left my Scorpio mother to go to college, she ended up living in 1 room in the back of my stepdad's ill-conceived business, working 2 to 3 jobs, and learning a life of post-dated checks and buying groceries on credit. 

My Scorpio assistant wants to decide what services she will and won't provide and when and how and how much. But if she doesn't do the job, she doesn't get to have my tranquil little oasis of a home all to herself twice a week, where she gets paid to take a nap with Daisy.

My Scorpio work-wife (I'm a work-wife polygamist, guilty as charged) wants to see me on the weekends but won't initiate, because a Scorpio cannot absorb a whiff of rejection. So they cannot ask. I can ask. But I don't. So my wife does not see me on the weekends. Obsessed with the date she refuses to set, each time we pass cubicles, she gets my attention and asks me to ask her. I'm like "Text me. You're busier than I am." And we go round and round and round in the circle game. My work-wife is the benign version of Scorpio Freddy.

Scorpios design their own prison to feel safe, get you to offer to cum during visiting hours, then complain about the warden they will never leave. Scorpios love a patsy. Because they cannot be wrong. So they just keep doing the time and pleading they were framed once the guard they are fucking turns his back.

How dare I deal in such stereotypes and labels and crass generalizations. Every individual is of course unique and ultimately unknowable. I only try to be a Scorpio expert because I love them so.

My Aquarius girlfriend has a Scorpio daughter with an insatiable appetite for hugs. The Water Bearer hides from her daughter's grip in the basement shitter. To protect her dignity. A text book Aquarius wants you to hug their brain and give a wide berth to their body. Scorpios typically express love through physical touch, because they cannot tell you. Telling is for Geminis.

It feels like I had a harem in a previous life in which all my permanent playthings were Scorpios. Including servants and slaves, but allowing for some token Virgos to TCB. I likes what I likes.

If a Scorpio isn't good at something the first time they try it, it's over. The proud Stinger can't be seen flailing or failing. This fixed sign hates change. They want what they know even if they hate it, because they think they can control what they have experience in. What

position is earned through the illusion of controlling garbage, dear Scorpio? King of the Junk Heap? My knees are dirty from curtsying before you.

I don't even live here, Scorpio. But you do. Choose wisely.

Until Next Time, Sweeties!

Ness Sweet Ness